We celebrated the marriage of two of our own church planters this week. I once told Handsome K “that guy is going to plant a church.” He is now. I once heard that girl (while in Houston at a conference) say she was made for this and she knows she will be involved with church planting. They fell in love and are now church planters.
Princess K had the opportunity to drop petals down the aisle before the bride walked down. She relished the day, getting attention from the bridesmaids and others. She told me she kept saying to herself “this is Chris and Tannis’ day” so she wouldn’t forget. In part, I think, because she was also having so much fun. This made me smile because I gave a passionate hopeful mommy speech about not complaining and not distracting from the bride and groom because in fact it was their day not ours. She was surrounded by women who love Jesus and spent time treating her like a real person, not just a kid who is in the background. I love that about our church and our staff. Princess K loves deeply and treasures relationships…she has a heart that will probably be broken and disappointed many times through her elementary, middle and high school years. She will learn about expectations and how only God will not fail her, hurt her or leave her.
It’s hard when people leave.
When we got in the car, all of us excited and a bit tired…she climbed into the back seat and began to cry. A heartfelt deeply sad cry with immediate tears. I glanced at Handsome K and crawled back with her. I asked her to tell me what she’s feeling, to tell me what is making her cry. She said, “I don’t like that we plant new churches and people have to leave. It’s sad. Chris and Tannis are moving and I won’t see them. Some of my friends (she used this to refer to the bridesmaids who showed her love and attention, ladies you play an important role in my daughter’s life) are leaving. Last year Craig and Kellie left.”
She said all of this through her tears while burying her head on me and having a hard time talking.
Our church is pushing back darkness on college campuses, starting new churches to do so. We are prayerfully raising up leaders and sending out teams to go. Princess K said it well, sometimes we don’t want to see them go because for our sake we like it better with them here. But for the Gospel’s sake they must go. Princess K is learning about sacrificing our comfort for God’s call. Princess K is learning about Love for Jesus over love for what’s easy and makes sense. Princess K is a feeler like her momma. We feel this deeply and it’s hard…but they must go.
We were talking about Moses’ response to God’s call this morning while the kids ate their brown sugar cinnamon bagels (cool mom=1, healthy breakfast=0). We saw how Moses doubted God was telling him to go, he doubted that God will also go with him and give him the words to say. God kind of told Moses…ok I’ll send your brother with you to do the talking if you doubt me so much. We talked about how Moses missed out because God was looking for him to simply be obedient and God would equip him for what he was being called to do. But God had a plan to push forward and He was going to do it with someone who was willing to be obedient and have faith. Aaron went along. Moses doubted.
God still did what He planned to do and used someone with an obedient heart.
I pray this is what Princess K sees when it’s sad and we ugly cry because people we love have to move. I had no idea that at 8 years old she felt this way. God made her with a heart that loves. I pray that she knows that people will come and go but the Lord is here to stay in her heart…never to go without her, always going before her and being right here with her too.
That’s my God.
Help us Lord to think more of your Kingdom than ours. Teach Princess K to know that pretty dresses and shiny lip gloss don’t make her beautiful, but you inside her is remarkable and radiant. That’s what she saw in the bride and groom this week…you inside of them, calling them forward to another place. Remind me to be obedient even in the little things for you desire to call us to bigger things for your kingdom yet seen, more than we can imagine possible.